Chiko can rant too: When did children start deciding what Mainstream is?

It’s been on my mind for years now… This whole bizarre phenomenon that started with music and TV. These days we have Justin Bieber… But it’s been going on for a while now. Somehow 8-14 year olds end up deciding what music becomes popular, and to me, it makes absolutely no sense at all.

Sure as hell not the voice of my generation.

To be brutally honest, I blame Disney. Somehow they’ve found a formula where they put a musically oriented show on TV, produce it’s own music, and put it out there. It sounds pathetic, but it works. They’ve easily made billions (with a B) off of this plan. This has become the norm, to the point where I’m legitimately surprised at how many networks have shows revolving around musical acts. Channels like Nickelodeon have wholeheartedly jumped on the bandwagon.

I mean seriously, lets run down the “memorable” ones: Hilary Duff, her sister, The Jonas Brothers, Justin Bieber, Miranda Cosgrove, Miley Cyrus… At this point I lose count. I'm amazed to say that some of these acts are just so generic that they make the boybands look like Zep by comparison.

Also, I blame this “anyone can sing” trend for being the cause of people like Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, and Kim Kardashian suddenly deciding to put out songs or whole albums. This whole “so easy a caveman can do it” attitude is killing music faster than the internet.

"Oh yeah, my first single drops on iTunes next week."

Speaking of the internet. If we need proof that this phenomenon has reached an all time low, you need look no further than Rebecca Black. The fact that this little girl became such a viral hit dumbfounds me. The fact that she's such a (and I use this term as loosely as possible) hit proves that we have decided to reward the shitty with some sort of fame, and that seems totally ridiculous, at least to me.

I remember the days where mainstream music was actually decided by people above the age of fourteen. You needed to at least be slightly edgy to be recognized. When I bought my copy of Enema Of The State I did it not only because the album is awesome (STFU it is and you know it!), but because it felt cool, everyone who was older and cooler than me was listening to it, and of course, it grew on me.

Poop jokes and porn stars. Those were the days.

Then again, I might just blame that douche Simon Cowell for making American Idol, a show that in ten seasons has made one legit star. The fans seem blind to it, but in all honesty, has anyone other than Kelly Clarkson (not counting that other douche Ryan Seacrest) ever done anything significant after being in a black hole of a television show.

Okay, back on subject... What’s going on with youth today? And even worse… What’s up with teenagers? And seriously… People my age, listening to Justin Bieber, watching Hannah Montana… What the fuck is wrong with you people!? It makes no sense. Since when is music for infants hip? (did I just write the word hip?)

I’m just saying… If music needs a whole daily half hour on TV to advertise… It’s probably not that good.