Netflix Reviews - December 14th

After finishing with finals for the semester, the first thing I did was sit down and watch movies. Here are the four movies I watched.

Hyde Park on Hudson (2012)

I remember seeing the trailer at the theater for this movie a while back. I was interested in seeing Bill Murray portray Franklin D. Roosevelt, although at the same time I thought it might take away from the film if it wanted to be serious at some point. I was surprised that the best thing about this film was Murray and especially his relationship with King George VI (portrayed by Samuel West). It felt genuine. The biggest problem with this film I think was that it started to give you an interesting plot, FDR's relationship with his cousin Daisy (played perfectly well by Laura Linney), his relationship with the royal family, etc. and you never really knew what this film wanted to talk about. The director was fine, but the screenplay was lacking. If they had tightened the script a little bit, this film would have been much better.

6 out of 10

Broken City (2013)

I don't really know why I bother sometimes with films like this one. I think the cast is what made me want to spend my time with this movie. Russell Crowe always does interesting movies and Mark Wahlberg can throw down on a nice action movie. That wasn't enough to salvage this film from being completely predictable. If you have seen 20 movies, chances are you have come across the powerful politician using his power to commit a crime plot. I would be surprised if you couldn't figure everything out after watching the first scene. I did. That really takes me out of a film. I like to be surprised and if you are going to do something that has been done to death, at least do it in an incredible way. None of that happens here. It just fails to be interesting in any way. Meh.

5 out of 10

Red Dawn (2012)

If the last film was a meh, this one is an ugh. First time director Dan Bradley tackles on a remake of the 1980s campy as fuck but still entertaining because its so ridiculous and it knows it film about a Russian invasion of the US and a group of teenagers who fight back. Why someone felt this needed a remake is beyond me. The original was a child of the times. Last years of the Cold War mixed with some 80s teenager action and sprinkled with a dose of patriotism. Here we have the North Koreans being the invaders and apparently being helped by the Russians... even though we only ever really see one Russian. Anyway, pretty boy Chris Hemsworth takes a break from ruling Asgard to ham it up something heavy in this flick. Sadly, everyone seems to be hamming it up. Josh Peck, who plays Hemsworth's brother (yeah, right), seems to be bored to tears by everything that is happening. Its a run of the mill actioner where you really root for the Koreans to stick it to these ingrate kids. And it doesn't even have the courtesy to show some tits or something... Also, by the way... fuck shaky cam.

3 out of 10

Killing Season (2013)

 After watching this film, I decided to check out the director. He wasn't terrible, but he wasn't great. There were some really interesting shots in the flick and I wanted to see what else he had made. Turns out Mark Steven Johnson has done crap filled with crap. Daredevil, Ghost Rider, and When in Rome... yeesh. Talk about a terrible track record. The movie deals with a Serbian soldier who searches for a US military man who served in Bosnia. Forget about the questionable history behind the conflict after Yugoslavia was torn to different countries and the involvement of US troops, forget the questionable serbian accent that Travolta tries on (and he talks a LOT), it all overshadows and makes seem worse a movie that is mediocre but has some interesting things. Especially the ending. It caught me by surprise and I thought it was a nice touch. I also have no problem with the torture scenes. People get all riled up whenever there are torture scenes in movies and video games and they need to chill out. Torture is supposed to make you feel queasy, that's the whole point. In the end, this is not an entirely terrible movie, but this one at least had some beautiful shots of the wilderness.

6 out of 10

Snow White is the fairest (but shallowest) of them all.

Snow White and the Huntsman

This movie is a re imagining of the classic Brothers Grimm fairy tale "Snow White and the Seven Dwarves".  The story has been bastardized through the years (especially by Disney) into a pretty tame story of envy and true love.  Sure, this was always a story of envy but the original story is much more interesting to read or probably to watch.  For this movie, they take some ideas from the original fairy tale and others from the Disney movie and make it into an amalgam of both but they also add some stuff of their own.  In this version, Snow White (played by Kristen Stewart) is held hostage by the evil Queen Ravenna (Charlize Theron) until she escapes from the Queen's brother (Sam Spruell).  The Queen sends the Huntsman (Chris Hemsworth) to kill her but he can't bring himself to do it so they escape and pass through different parts of the kingdom in search of safety.  That is the basic premise of the movie.  Obviously, it gets a little more convoluted with trolls and faeries and Ian McShane as a 4 foot dwarf.

First, I'd like to talk about the plot of the movie.  While there were some interesting moments in this film, everything felt a little disjointed.  It's not surprising that the screenplay was written by three different writers.  It feels like two different movies for two different crowds and they never really mesh.  While the idea of having the Huntsman play a bigger role is a nice touch but the character of William (Sam Claflin), who is supposed to be her friend from so long ago who risks his life to get her to safety and then nothing really happens, is completely wasted.  The Queen's brother is also there to just bother the good guys and get them moving from locale to locale.  I feel this was drawn up to have some sort of love triangle angle between Bella, Jacob and Edward... wait... I sometimes confuse movies.

  Officer: Mr. Mirror, I'm going to have to take your driver's license away.

Mirror: But why?

Officer: Does the term legally blind mean anything to you?

Now, while better things could have been done with William and especially the dwarves, the biggest problem with this movie is in its cast.  If you go at to the movie's IMDb page, it wouldn't surprise me if people were excited to see the movie.  Charlize Theron is a proven actress; Chris Hemsworth while sometimes lacking charisma can do a good job; and the dwarves are a who's who of British acting with Ian McShane, Bob Hoskins, Ray Winstone, Toby Jones, Eddie Marsan, Nick Frost, and Johnny Harris.  It was missing Dame Judi Dench and Bill Nighy and it would be a done deal.  These are all fantastic actors and they mostly do okay in this film, but the main and most important character is sadly played by someone who has no range.  Kristen Stewart makes this movie completely dull.  The moments where we are supposed to feel happy or hopeful or sad and distraught are ruined by her mechanical expressions.  How are we supposed to feel connected to this movie if the person we should rally for can't give us even one heartfelt smile?  They also tried to make Snow White into some sort of Joan of Arc character but Stewart doesn't inspire anyone to believe in her cause. 

And you know what is worse, it feels like she was picked for this part for the sole reason of bringing in the legions of Twihards out there.  And you know what makes me feel shittier?  I actually used to like Kristen Stewart.  I thought she would become a pretty good actress.  I am ashamed.  When Snow White tries to rally the troops, I couldn't help but groan.  Here is where I thought director Rupert Sanders should have come in and done something about all this.  All he could do was waste 120 million dollars on the cinematography, costume design and special effects.

Colleen Atwood did a magnificent job with the costume designs for the movie.  She is definitely one of the highlights of the whole film.  The feather coat looks fantastic on Charlize Theron and makes her look incredibly dark and more important beautiful and menacing at the same time.

The set designs are also very well done.  The forests, the castle on the shore, the faerie part of the forest, even the lakeside village looked great.  They definitely outdid themselves in the technical aspects.  Especially when it came to things like the troll on the bridge and the fact that they took full size actors and shrunk them down.  It was off putting at first, but then they definitely do grow on you.

The score was also a bit of a mixed bag.  A lot like this film.  While there are incredibly beautiful music in there to fit with the scenery, the main song for this movie feels so out of place.  "Breath of Life" by Florence + The Machine is just not the song for an epic like this one.  "Gone" by Ioanna Gika is breath taking, unlike the song mentioned before.

Now, am I the only one that is creeped the hell out by two different men who are neither family nor romantically involved with Snow White kiss her in the mouth while they think that she is dead?  Ugh.  Perverted is more like it.

Officer: Dude... step away from the dead lady!  Can't you at least wait till she gets to the morgue?  Jeez!

In the end, this movie is a lot of style and very little substance.  There are some amazingly stylish shots.  The shot of Theron giving her back to the camera and she is bending over and you can see the bones of the spinal cord is fantastic.  As is the shot of her coming out of the white substance she gets into (milk?  I hope its milk cause otherwise... *shudder*).  It shows that Sanders does have potential to be a pretty good film maker.  It is not the worst movie out there, but its not worth watching in the theaters.  The sets are great, the special effect are pretty damned good, the costumes are fantastic but the acting (from Stewart), the screenplay and the directing are amateurish.

3 out of 10

  

4 things that could have made Thor better.

Now I know what you're saying... "It was a good movie!" And I agree. I quite enjoyed it. But as a fan, there's always that one little thing, that wasted opportunity that just ticked me off (notice I didn't say 'piss me off' because, again, I liked the movie).

So, with that said...
Let the nitpicking begin!


1- We needed more of:
Yes, there were couple of characters that needed more screen time, whether it be because they needed more of a build, or simply because they were just screen stealers.

The prime example here is obviously Loki. I'm not complaining about what he did, or how he was portrayed. We just needed more of him. Maybe an extra visit to Thor on Earth or something, just to drive the "I'm a dick" point home. This becomes an even bigger issue when you think that Loki is the rumored villain for the upcoming Avengers flick.

Then we have the case of Heimdall, who really just steals every scene he's in. A great blend of writing and performance (and an awesome giant fucking sword) kept you hoping he'd just show up again just for a second.

Honorable mention: That asian guy with the raspy voice. He was just fun to watch. And he sounded funny.

2- We needed less of:
Natalie Portman. That's right, the Jane Foster character is totally forgettable. This can be blamed on the Hollywood-ness of it all. To these people, the romance needs to be there almost as bad as the shirtless scene. In all honesty, all the character did was make googly eyes at Thor the whole movie. I would have much preferred to see more of Kat Dennings, at least she had some humor to her.

3- A better post-credits thingy:
I might be stingy with that one, just to keep it spoiler-less.
Marvel movies in recent years have become famous for making people sit through the credits. But on this occasion I was slightly disappointed. Not that it was bad. But it just wasn't up to the standards that recent Marvel flicks have set. Iron Man still sticks out as the best post-credits scene, and as much as a tie-in as this must be to the Avengers plot, this is still the weakest.

4- It needed one more song...
And here is where I get to rage... Because even if it was during the end credits, we got to hear Black Sabbath's Iron Man during Iron Man... And it was awesome. Everyone in the theater was rocking out as the credits started. It was just a great way to close off a great movie. I would have even thrown it in when he was wearing the suit for the first time, just for the hell of it.

Now we fast forward to Thor, and I'm thinking to myself... "What awesome song are we going to get to pump us up in the movie?" I said it jokingly, because I knew what I wanted. It had to be there, there's no way it isn't.

Halfway through it we get Walk by the Foo Fighters. And I will admit, it brought a smile to my face. You all know I love that band. But that's not what I was waiting for. I expected it during the end credits. And then, they gave me Walk again.

Now, I ask you, my readers... If Iron Man had Iron Man... Shouldn't Thor have God Of Thunder by Kiss?! Just listen to it...

We would have been pumped! I feel Marvel has done me an injustice. I might even say that I wrote this whole article just to get to that point. Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley should feel robbed of their birthright.

Fine, I might be pushing it a bit (just a bit!). But it really would have been great. Maybe in the sequel.

One last thing... *pats self on back for not making one single Asgard joke*. Ok, I'm good.

Come all ye Asgardians!

In order for this to be a proper review, I have to admit that Thor is my favorite Marvel character. So, if you feel like I’m being too nice to it, then just know that I might be a little bit subjective. With that out of the way, I want to touch on one other thing which some might bring up. While the character Thor is obviously the based on the character of Nordic mythology, the movie is based on the comic books and not the actual mythology (still remembers people criticizing 300 for not being historically accurate). With that out of the way, here’s my review…

Thor deals with the title character’s war with himself and his “brother” Loki for the throne of Asgard. Odin, the all father (Anthony Hopkins), exiles Thor from Asgard and sends him into Midgard (Earth) in order to teach him a lesson. At first, we see that Thor (Chris Hemsworth) is arrogant and foolish as he betrays his father’s trust and disobeys his orders, causing a war where peace had reigned for a long time. After Thor is banished, Loki (Tom Hiddleston) uses this chance as a way to capture the throne of Asgard from an old Odin.

Thor (now without his powers) is sent to Earth where he meets astrophysicist Jane Foster (Natalie Portman), Dr. Erik Selvig (Stellan Skarsgard) and Darcy Lewis (Kat Dennings). On Earth, he has to deal with not having any powers, S.H.I.E.L.D., and eventually a big fire-breathing robot. I thought the romance part was pretty weak but that’s not really what matters in the movie.

Now, I always thought that making a movie based on Thor would be too hard an undertaking to tackle. Thor is not your typical super hero. He talks in a Shakespearian way and it doesn’t seem like he is interesting enough to be able to handle a whole movie by himself. Thankfully, Marvel understood this and gave him a plethora of characters for him to be able work. Not only many characters, but these characters are played by pretty good actors. Portman, Skarsgard, and Hopkins are proven top quality actors that can hold their own and be able to work with someone like Chris Hemsworth who is pretty much a newcomer to Hollywood. Thor’s friends are not much interesting except for Siff (who actually is the wife of Thor in Nordic mythology). Also, I would watch a movie based solely on Heimdall but only if its played by Idris Elba.


But the thing that made me think that this actually had the chance of being a good movie was the director that Marvel chose. Kenneth Branagh might not be the most known director to the casual crowd of movie goers, but for anyone that knows, he is the Shakespearean director bar none (his 4 hour version of Hamlet is pretty damn awesome). And it works.

The biggest flaw in the film is the villains. When people think of awesome superhero movies, they think of villains like the Joker. Although he has some cool powers, Loki is just too weak to actually go against Thor believably. Loki’s powers and skills just don’t show well on the screen. He is too subtle. The Destroyer was mostly a joke as well. So while the villains in the movie aren’t very strong, its all about Thor’s journey as he battles himself in order to eventually become the king of Asgard.

Even though I may be talking about all the bad things that this movie has, I enjoyed the film. I thought the movie as a complete package works well. Not only that, but it does a good job in working as a trampoline for the Avengers movie that will rock the world very soon.

6.5 out of 10